Open Chistmas/Holiday Letter

Happy Holidays from Abby

As I sit here on this Christmas Eve morning, I can't help but reflect on the past year and am grateful that time moves forward, welcoming change and growth.  This time last year I was facing my first holiday season without a significant other in six years and still dealing with the aftermath of the end of that relationship, but was also looking forward to the positive changes that 2011 promised.  I thought I'd take a little time to share some of the (at times unexpected) lessons that I have learned over the past 12 months.

1) My arms are not six feet long.  What's that you say?  "Of course they're not Kat!"  This one seems like it would be common sense, but it is also something I seemed to have forgotten on that February morning as I attempted to reach for the bathroom door from the shower.  The end result: a trip to the ER at 8am on the morning after a snowstorm and five stitches in my right arm.  The other lesson learned: Let the cat meow... she can wait to get out of the bathroom.

2) Dory was a super smart fish. "When life gets you down, do you wanna know what you've gotta do? Just keep swimming." There is so much truth in this statement, and it really speaks to resiliency, which I've always believed is a strength of mine.  It is too easy to stay under the covers and hide from the world when your heart is broken, life has left you disappointed, and you have no idea what the future holds.  Trust me, I have had many moments where I've indulged in a pity-party for one, and while it is okay to do that every now and then because you have to acknowledge your emotions, it's not healthy to stay in that dark place.  Just keep swimming.  It's the only way that things get better.

3) Some days you gotta dance.  Yep, the Dixie Chicks were right about that one.  I love to dance, although I am not very skilled at it, and thankfully have rediscovered the joy I used to feel in simply moving my body to music.  It's a great way to get some exercise and release pent up frustration (some days I do still prefer cardio kickboxing though).  In all honesty, the Belly dance classes I've been taking since October 2010 have been the impetus for many lessons and most importantly, insight into myself.  I continue to learn and grow on a weekly basis.  I started taking Bollywood lessons as well, and was introduced to other forms of dance/exercise during the recent 12 days of fitness challenge at the studio.  I am thankful for all my teachers, which includes the instructors and fellow students.  I am encouraged to try new things, allowed to make mistakes, encouraged to laugh at myself, not expected to be perfect (since there really is no such thing as perfection), but most importantly, I am accepted for who I am.  That, perhaps, is the most precious gift I've received.

4) You may not be where you expected, but you're exactly where you're supposed to be/Life's a marathon, not a sprint.  This is one I'm still working on, but it's an important one.  If you had asked me 10 years ago, I would have said that at age 34 I would be married with children, and happy in my career.  If you had asked me a year ago, I would have said (and did say) that I was just going to stay single for the rest of my life.  Am I where I thought I would be?  Absolutely not.  But, I trust that whatever has happened, has happened for a reason and that there is no grand timeline that I must follow.  I have always done things at my own pace.  Although I do get frustrated sometimes, I know that what is meant to be, will be.  Enjoy life and all the treasures it offers.

5) Friends come in unexpected places.  I had no idea when I reconnected with a long-time friend (the lovely and wonderful Melissa Amster) and joined her facebook book club (Chick Lit Central, unabashed plug) that I would end up with at least a dozen new friends that I've never met face-to-face.  And while some people say that the general anonymity of the internet does not permit real connections between people, it was some of these new friends that were a tower of strength and support through some very difficult days this past summer.  Yes, I would have gotten through the experience without them, but their presence in my life and their words of compassion lifted my heart and made me feel comforted in a way that would not have happened without them.  That my friends, is a gift I can never repay.

6) Love and time heals.  The loss that I have experienced since June 2010 has been considerable to me.  I find it difficult even now to put these thoughts into words.  While some loss was by choice, and certainly was something that needed to happen, the loss of my furry babies Tigger Joe and Piper (as well as Tai, Loki, Belle and Peanut who did not pass but were still taken out of my life) was a heartbreak that felt unending at times.  We had the Tig monster for a wonderful 20 years and he lived a long, happy life (and to this day I have never seen another orange tabby with pure white at the end of the tail).  I know without a doubt that Piper came into my life because I needed her; she helped my broken heart heal and became the love of everyone's life.  Her unexpected passing in June 2011 was an experience that words just cannot express properly.  I miss her every day, but am grateful that she chose me and I know that one day we will meet again.  Although I did not know if I would be able to open up my heart again, fate intervened and brought little miss Abby into my life.  Her unconditional love and the smiles she brings to my face on a daily basis have once again helped to heal and lessened the hurt.  You just cannot help but love her and her rather ungraceful flops on the floor and demands for belly rubs, loud purring, constant chatter (she really tells you off if she's ticked), amazing jumps and acrobatics while playing, and of course, kitten kisses in the crook of your elbow (or on your hands and feet).  This will be Abby's first Christmas, and I think everyone is more excited about what fun she'll be having than anything else. 

So, from Abby and myself, we wish you all a holiday season filled with love, laughter and hope.  May 2012 be a year of dreams come true.  Much love!